reflections and current events

   Good evening everybody!! I hope all is good and your weekend is going good. Fore warning I'm not really sure what i will be writing about tonight. I have a few ideas but not really sure which direction i will go. So i will just throw my thoughts at the keyboard and see what sticks.
   So today i attended a graduation party. It was kind of surreal and unbelievable that's 11 years ago i was at my grad party. Man i remember the excitement of finally being done with school. Knowing i had the whole world out there for me to explore! And there for awhile i was really thinking about moving away and seeing what i could find. Obviously i didn't cause here i sit. Not a bad thing i really probably wouldn't have been able to leave. In all honesty id miss my brother way too much! Looking back im really surprised he didn't knock the shit out of me. I can be really hard to deal with and back then i was probably a handful. We use to get into arguments and there have been a few days we didn't speak. I think it was a tough time for both of us back then and it was our way of venting. So hey why not fight with each other. Lol. You know its funny how looking back now i know he was always looking out for me. Too bad that stubborn side of me was in control. Now i go to him for advice quite a bit. Even though hes a Jeff Gordon fan he is still a great guy.I have always looked up to him.
    It was so weird today because it was almost like a reunion today except everybody has had kids in the past ten years well except me. I keep telling myself when the time is right. Til then i wait. I may not be playing for the Yankees like i dreamed but i have a good job. Pay my bills and am working towards my goals. I haven't taken much time for fun but i have done one thing and that's worked and worked hard. I may not have much to show for it but im working on that part to and that's a slow process but in time i will get there. I really need a plan. More than just work work work. I feel like im working towards retirement but in the meanwhile i have things i want now. I don't want to wait thirty tears and be like yeah now i can get these things i want. Like a new house. Its like i have a hundred things i want to do all at once and well obviously i cant do them all at the same time.I will tell you something i really miss my PlayStation!!! Its going on three weeks now since i took it to get repaired. The game card broke not the laser. A few will understand that joke. The PlayStation 2 just isn't cutting it anymore. It was a tide me over but dammit i want to play ops!!
    I know this next subject will sit well with some and others will shutter at the thought. I am one to shutter. Its only two days from August which means Summer is winding down already. Damn where does the time go? I still haven't made it to the race track in p.a. Although i am going to Watkins Glen in a couple of weeks!!!! I cant wait! My escape from everything.Still don't know if we are camping or not. I kind of want to just go the day of but hey im down for whatever. This whole year has been a set back. Lack of hours at work mean lack of money and i have to buy pellets still. Oh well hopefully the cold weather is still at least three months away. I just feel overwhelmed at times with all this stuff. Man does it ever end? Things will get better right/ Right? As long as i stay busy it'll keep my mind busy from it all. Well i think im going to end this for the night. Maybe ill post another one tomorrow seens i have been slacking lately. Actually work has been mad crazy these last few weeks. Ever since that week off things have been just hectic. The start times were different everyday last week. This week looks a little better as far as times. Hopefully i walk out of there before 230 and 330. But im making paper and i have a job some aren't as lucky so ill take it and smile. Good night everybody