Saturday, May 11, 2013

A note for my Mom

       So here we are Mothers day again. This will mark the 19th year Ive done this. Its a very bittersweet day for me. On one hand I'm grateful to have the memories of my Mom. I cherish them and hold them near and dear to my heart. Then on the other hand id give anything to be living somewhere and come back home to take her out to breakfast and spend the day with her. Then again to be honest I'm pretty sure i wouldn't be far away from home. This day and the month of June are difficult but i know both my Mom and Dad would yell at me for feeling sad. So ill wear a smile and it may or may not be real!!! It doesnt ever get easier but everyday i learn a new way to cope.
     What can i possibly say about my Mom? If you had the pleasure of meeting her then you know how great she was. There aren't any words i can use to explain her. She was just awesome. After school we would play basketball or throw the baseball or football. We use to watch scrabble after school too. Heck, she even would play video games with me. Mostly Wheel Of Fortune and Jeopardy. I always find myself wondering how different my life would be if she were still here. I know damn well i wouldve done alot better in school. That was a must!! Every spring i see the flowers in bloom and i think of her. That's the kind of woman she was. Beautiful. Loving and caring. Id always have a friend spend the night on Fridays and most of the time Saturdays too.
     Theres not a day that doesn't go by i don't think about her even if just once. As a kid thunderstorms use to scare me and i was always scared that we would have a tornado. I don't know why but it was a fear of mine growing up. So every night there was a storm she would lay with me until i fell asleep. Always telling me we would be okay and nothing would happen. And well she was right. LOL!!!She always told me "I'm your Mother and Mothers know best!" Any Moms out there feel free to use that line! Man, it use to frustrate me! Nowadays i just smile and shake my head. She was right, Mothers do know best. Its funny the little things i remember. Her and i were standing in the kitchen when she told me Santa wasn't real. I didn't cry i think i told her i knew and she asked how i knew and i said i dunno i just had a feeling. LOL!!! "You are my sunshine" was the song she always would sing to me! Our house is yellow because that is her favorite color and well that's why its my favorite color too. Plus the sun is yellow and well the sun makes everyone happy. 
      Sometimes this life isn't fair. Questions that ill always have. Someday ill get answers. Someday ill see my Mom again and it ll be one of the reunions I've waited so long for. Shes one of my guardian angels and although i may not be able to see her. I can feel her and i know shes by my side as she has always been. So Happy Mothers Day to the worlds greatest Mom! I may not of had you in my life for a long time but the time i had i cherished! You taught me so many things through the years and i know you are guiding me through life. I Love you and miss you everyday. Thank you for being my Mom i couldn't have asked for a better Mom than the one i have!! Love always your sunshine <3

















     I really wish she were still here.

1 comment:

  1. Such a beautiful sentiment bro. I really wish that I had gotten to meet, not only her, but your father as well.

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